My love affair with Hostess began with Snowballs then gradually moved to on to a brief encounter with chocolate cupcakes and finally to the ever lustrous Ding Dong, where I stayed true to the end. Like a Magpie, I was immediately drawn to its shiny exterior. Biting into chocolate cake and then into the fluffy filling would transport me to another world. One where everyone was happily singing and dancing down a candy coated sidewalk.
See, It all started when we were kids. Sister and I were pretty much raised on condiments, putt pies (pot pies) and Hostess products until the magical day when she could start taking Home Ec. in school. Mother, (bless her heart) wasn't exactly the Suzie Homemaker type so we basically had to fend for ourselves, especially where breakfast was concerned. Often times on the way to school we would stop at the 7-11 and get a package of whatever. Since I was a pink girly girl, Snowballs were my breakfast of champions; with the added bonus for entertainment value, Snowballs were just the ticket! I wasn't a sun-uva-bitch about the coconut on the spongy marshmallow jacket but if you turned it inside out, rolled it up and popped it in your mouth, you hardly noticed it. My mouth would be filled with pink marshmallow goodness! Why, I ate so many of those darn snowballs, I began to resemble one!
My taste became a tad more sophisticated in my teenage years when I became a Ding Dong convert. More often than not you could find a box of them squirrelled away under the bed or in the closet, for those times when nothing else could soothe my achy breaky heart. Ding Dongs never let me down!
Even though its been years since one of those glistening cream filled hockey pucks crossed my lips, there was comfort in knowing they were as near as the neighborhood Walmart. A Little Debbie might do in a pinch but its like comparing apples and oranges. And who wants an apple or an orange when one is jonseing for a Twinkie?
I am a firm believer that Hostess will rise from the ashes but in the mean time we might very well start seeing 12-Step Hostess programs springing up or perhaps there will be an Hostess altar on aisle 10 where we can light a candle.
All us Baby Boomers are sad. Some people are stocking up on what was left on the shelves. The good part is, they will last for the next generation, as they are made with all nutritious artificial ingredients and petroleum based by-products.
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